I’m jealous of my attractive employee and it’s impacting how I treat her — Ask a Manager


Remember the letter-writer who was jealous of her attractive employee and it was impacting how she treated her? The first update is here, second update is here, and the third update is here.) Here’s a new update.

I have been sober since March 19, 2017.

I completed my rehab programs for both my addiction issues and my eating disorder. I still visit my therapist once a week for a check-in. In the evening I still attend meetings for one of the two support groups I belong to, one for eating disorders and one for addiction. These things help me keep in check and make me feel calm and supported. I feel happier than I have ever been and therapy and support groups help.

I no longer use any kind of substance or pills and won’t take anything unless it is prescribed and I am under the supervision of the doctor. Nothing over the counter or anything along those lines. In the past year the only time I have needed to take anything was before a dental appointment under his watch. My anxiety is under control with my therapy and the coping techniques I have learned. In my case I am no longer on medication for it and I feel comfortable with this (I am not saying no one should go without it, just me). I don’t weigh myself or own a scale. I cook and have a better relationship with food.

The other four weekdays I work at the job I mentioned in my last update. On the weekend I attend church, volunteer there and spend time with my family. I work with nice people who are aware of my past issues as I have nothing to hide. I have made new friends in the support groups and at church. I addressed the situation re: my old friends in my last update and that has not changed.

I wanted to send you a note because you and your readers were so supportive. I am still sober despite a couple of bumps in the road: A criminal case from my conduct to my former employee and the reappearance of an ex-boyfriend. The court case resulted in conviction. I got a suspended sentence because I had already gone to rehab on my own and settled the lawsuit at the first chance.

Therapy has helped work out that the case was warranted, anyone who heard the facts would agree. I am okay with the outcome and have accepted responsibility. The outcomes of the lawsuit and criminal case forbid me from contacting my former employee at her request. I have had no contact since I was fired from my job. I wish her well.

My ex-boyfriend told everyone who would listen online and in person he knew I had problems and he had tried to warn me something was wrong with me and had tried to help me despite my “verbal and emotional abuse.” I admit to not being perfect in the relationship. Fortunately my family, new coworkers and fellow church members paid no attention. My old coworkers and friends surely did.

I’m thankful to my parents for taking me in and for paying for my lawyers, my rehab and the lawsuit settlement. Without them I wouldn’t have made it this far. My brother got married this year and my sister-in-law is pregnant and I will be an aunt any day now. At the end of the day I am still sober. I have my health. I have support from the people around me. The rest is just background noise.

I send wishes to you and your supportive readers for a prosperous year. I owe my new life to all of you as well. All the best. Your book was great and I give it as a gift and tell everyone I know to read it.



Source link